I wish she'd shut up about back to school already...

Conversation with Munchkin in the car home this afternoon:

Me: So what did you learn in school today?
Munchkin: Everything.
Me: Everything? So you're done with school then? We don't have to go back?
Munchkin (rolls eyes): No Mommy, I mean everything for today.
Me: Oh, of course... well what did you learn then?
Munchkin: I don't know.
Me (exasperated): Did you go to PE today?
Munchkin: No, we had library.
Me: Did you check out any books?
Munchkin: We didn't actually go to the library. We watched a movie.
Me: Oh cool, what movie was it?
Munchkin: I don't remember the name of it.
Me: What was it about?
Munchkin: An alligator was eating kids.

WTF?!

I send my child to school to be traumatized by natural Florida wildlife.

I also learned today that Bug's new school is so overcrowded that they can't actually eat lunch in the cafeteria. The kids who bring their lunches sit at their desks and the kids who buy lunch go to the cafeteria and buy food and then they bring it back and eat it at their desk. No wonder it takes me a half hour to get through the school pick up line to get him in the afternoon!

Speaking of the pick up line at Bug's school. It's quite the chaotic event. Bug's school is on the corner of two relatively decent sized roads and some parents choose to park their vehicles on the side of the road and just walk up to the school to grab their child. This causes mayhem as some cars try to get "prime parking spots" closer to the school than others and parents and kids are walking all over the place and I'm fairly positive there will be some injuries there before the school year is up. I'm sorry, but it's worth my extra few minutes to pick Bug up at the school and make sure he doesn't get run over by some mad frantic parent or some high school kid that happens to be traveling through the area. The crossing guards are all blowing their whistles like twenty bazillion times and yelling at people who block the crosswalk and getting all bent out of shape. Those ladies sure need a cocktail, that's all I have to say. A cocktail after work, of course. Drunk crossing guards would be bad.

Cars are trying to get into the parking lot from both directions and this poor administrator woman is trying to direct the traffic and practically getting run over by parents who have been waiting for 20 minutes and are all angsty. She lets two cars in from one direction, then two cars in from the other and so on. She has this big smile plastered on her face even though all these parents look at her like she's got a target painted on her backside. Perhaps she has had a cocktail.

The pick up line itself is a snake through the parking lot much like a line at Disney World, which is sort of funny because you can actually see your child waiting WAY before you can actually get to the child. There is much waving from cars (including between me and Bug). Today between picking up Munchkin and then Bug I spent an hour and a half of my life and probably a half gallon of gas.

I'm can't wait till Bug is assigned a bus.