Tuesday, January 8, 2008

Back to Normal... sort of

Yesterday the kids went back to school. They were supposed to be there at 8 AM. That's when I woke up. Oops.

Poor Bug somehow thought it was his fault and looked at me pitifully and said "Sorry, Mommy."

Awww... what kind of bitchy morning torture must I be putting that boy through? It's true though - I'm not even really human until 10 AM. Someday all my children will ride a bus in the morning and be able to dress themselves and wake up to alarm clocks and I won't emerge from my bed until 10 AM. Until that day, I am fueled by coffee and as little noise as possible.

I did manage to get them there by 8:45, even putting Munchkin's hair in a nice slick pony tail. I didn't even freak out or run around like a banshee to do it, either. I calmly fed them both Lucky Charms, drank coffee and ate my granola (Did you know granola had that many calories! Diet food my butt!), and sat watching Morning Joe on MSNBC while they ate and got dressed. I'm not actually sure why I watch Morning Joe... I'm trying be a little more versed on current events but it's not working. Now I think I just know enough to stick my foot in my mouth in conversations with better educated people.

Me: "So Obama seems to be pulling in front for the nomination."
Smartee: "Yes, he's quite charming, isn't he? Aside from being a socialist baby killer with little to no experience, I believe he can inspire our American people to stand up and take responsibility for their own nation. Certainly a trait that is lacking in Clinton."
Me: "My thoughts exactly..."

I'm learning (slowly, but surely) to keep my mouth shut about politics and religion. Neither subject is one that I am very well educated in but I do know what I don't agree with. Unfortunately, I'm finding that my opinions seem to be in the minority - especially among my conservative Catholic family. It's not exactly as though this realization is a big shock to me, or even that it's a recent realization. I've known I'm different than they are for quite some time. It's just lately that it has really affected me so much.

You see, I've been trying this whole "be true to myself" thing recently and though it truly does make me feel more complete and honest as a person, it really does change the way I see those around me. It makes me more inclined to stand up for myself and share my beliefs with those who may disagree with them. It makes me less scared to offend, less worried about what people may think. Because truly - if you don't like me for me, then our relationship isn't real anyway.

My Dad has said recently that I've become more sensitive. He's wrong, though. I'm just as sensitive as I always have been, I was just scared to let people know they had hurt my feelings before. Now I'm learning that it's alright to let it out, alright to cry, alright to disagree. Conflict is not my enemy.

More on that another day. Today I must get some work done and clean up the house a little. I still have Christmas up. Not sure I'm ready to take it down yet. ;)