I see your HINEY! All bright and SHINY!

The Teenager has some sort of cold. She's all sniffly and "oh, my life sucks" and "the bed is too hot" and all that.

And I'm all "You're going to school."

And then I'm all I wonder if she has swine flu....

And Google said "Relax, Spaz, it's probably not the swine flu because sniffles are not a sign of it."

And I was like "Whew! Thanks, Google!"

And then I giggled because H1N1 looks like "hiney" to me and I'm really a twelve year old trapped in the body of a thirty-two year old.

Thirty-two? Really?

And then I put hand soap, Ricola, and Purell on my grocery list.

UPDATE!
This morning The Teenager still felt terrible but insisted that she was well enough to go to school. School thought differently. They called and I picked her up and took her to the Take Care Clinic where it was confirmed that she does NOT have swine flu. Just the regular one. *sigh*