Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Chickens and Turkeys and Ducks, Oh My!

I've finally figured it out. I've figured out why my house cannot seem to maintain any level of cleanliness, why the laundry is out of control, why this blog has been hopelessly overlooked, and why my kids have had chicken nuggets and pizza as their main staples for the last month or so.

That's right... there is an evil lurking in my life. An evil so powerful, so mind altering, so alluring and seemingly harmless that I have allowed it to creep into my world and take over.

The evil's name is Farmville.


That's right. I said it. Damn you, Zynga Game Network! Damn you!

It started harmlessly enough. I had dabbled a bit in the realm of Facebook games. I'd had a nice time decorating a little apartment in YoVille and had spent some time challenging other sisters in Sorority Life. But I knew my limitations and I could stop at any time.

It was then when I started getting invitations.

"B1 wants you to be her neighbor in Farmville!"

I quickly hit the ignore button. I didn't need to play any other games.

But then the next day the invitation would come again.

"B1 wants you to be her neighbor in Farmville!"


After a few of these invitations I finally got a call from B1.

"Why won't you be my neighbor?"

I began the explanation. Oh, B1, I'd love to but you know I just don't have time for that and I already played a little too much of the other games and I really need to focus on some other things in my life and...

"I need 8 neighbors to upgrade my farm. I need you to be my neighbor."


Okay.... what harm could it do to just be a good neighbor?

And that's how it started.

The next thing I knew I was scouring my friends posts for lost chickens and cows and sheep. I was laying out patterns for crops and calculating what would bring me the most revenue. I was devising strategies and arranging my livestock and clicking and clicking and CLICKING.

I was hastily rushing home to harvest before my crops died. I was fertilizing friends crops. I was accepting gifts.

And my life? My real life?

It was crumbling around me.

I'm vowing now to leave the farm behind me. To stop it, to let it go! It's a new years resolution of sorts. I will not let the farm run my life.

And I'm calling out to you, you know who you are, to put the mouse down! Blink the hay bales out of your eyes and return to your families! It's time to say goodbye, Farmville, goodbye and good riddance.


Anonymous said...[Reply to comment]

I KNOW WHO B1 IS!!! lol.. my mother should read this.. seriously funny.

Anonymous said...[Reply to comment]

That is too funny & too true!!!! I know just what you mean, I've been sucked into the vortex, too!
Want to be my neighbor?....LOL!!!!!!

Bonnie said...[Reply to comment]

So true but I'm not giving up the farm!!!!! Signed B1