Where I ask the Internetz to tell me their irrational fears so I don't feel like such a dumbass

My parents have this hot tub.  And, as their favorite daughter, they allow me to use it pretty much whenever I'd like to. (They allow my sisters to use it whenever they want to, as well, but that doesn't diminish the fact that I'm their favorite.)

Since the past week or so has been particularly stressful, The Man and I decided to partake in some hot tub time the other night.

It was so relaxing, so quiet and calm, and we were really enjoying feeling our muscles relax and the hot water and the bubbles and the beer.  Sounds lovely, doesn't it?

It was at night and we left the lights on the patio mostly off, you know, for ambiance, and when I looked down I noticed a leaf was stuck to my arm.  Stray vegetation occasionally finds its way into the hot tub, even though the patio is screened in, because there are lush plants and stuff inside the enclosure.  I thought nothing of it and just reached over to pull said leaf off of my arm.

And that's when the leaf hopped.

Have I mentioned my irrational, intense fear of frogs on the blog before? Evidently I've mentioned it, but I haven't elaborated.  Frogs are the scariest things in the world to me.  When I was a kid, they weren't a big deal.  In fact, I really loved them as a teenager and even had a little necklace with a silver frog on it because I thought they were so cute.  They are cute.  As long as they're in pictures or behind glass.  But if a frog has the potential to jump on me, it invokes a terror inside of me that I can't quite explain.  It's irrational... I mean, no one has ever been hurt by a frog that I know of.  Aside from poisonous frogs and I don't think I've ever come into contact with one of them.  But it's not the idea that it might be excreting deadly toxins from its slimy skin that scares the crap out of me, it's the unpredictability of them.

Pretty much every other creature in the animal kingdom (aside from gigantic predators that are really hungry maybe) will run away from a human if one comes near.  Lizards, snakes, toads (toads and frogs are not the same thing), mice, rats, rabbits, birds, wallabies, aye ayes (my precious), bats, armadillos, and everything else all run away when a human comes near.

If you don't see the resemblance, I just don't know if we can be friends.

Frogs do not. Frogs hang out, look directly at you, and then jump on your face. And sometimes, while on your face, they PEE.  So my fear isn't completely irrational.

Yes, I know the frog, even if it pees, is not going to kill me or probably even make me sick.  But I am terrified, nonetheless.

So when this "leaf" proved itself to not be a leaf at all, but instead proved itself to be a tiny frog disguised as a leaf, I freaked out.

Maybe freaked out isn't even an accurate description.

I didn't scream, I couldn't scream. I didn't run, I was paralyzed. I merely clung to The Man as if he was Superman and we were flying 30,000 feet above the earth and if I let him go I would plunge to my death. I did not breathe, I did not talk, there were no words.

The Man continued to try to calm me down. I was wide eyed with terror, clinging to him, digging my fingers into his back, and looking wildly around to see if the frog was anywhere preparing to make a second attack.

When I could finally speak again, the only thing I said was "Where is it??!??!?!"

He assured me it was gone, that I had probably traumatized it.  I had traumatized it.

The Man pryed me, crowbar style, off of him and, when my legs had returned to a solid from their gelatinous, terrified state, we left the hot tub.

Relaxing, my ass.  I have never been so tense before in all my life.  Literally, I would rather be held at gun point than have a frog jump on me.





Make me feel better, Internetz. Share your irrational fears with me so I don't feel like such a complete dumbass.  And maybe some day I'll be able to get back in the hot tub.

I'm horrified... and terrified...

What do you do if you find out that your teenage daughter has been harassed on the bus?  And not just a little harassed, not just picked on or laughed at.  What do you do when you find out that a group of boys is sexually harassing your teenage daughter on the bus. Every day.  To the point where she doesn't want to ride the bus anymore.

And the boys aren't just making comments, either.  The harassment includes grabbing her, dropping their pants in front of her, and rubbing themselves.

What do you do if you find out that she's told her bus driver about it and the bus driver told her to "deal with it yourself."

Do you call the school, the police, the boys parents? Do you just keep your daughter of the bus and say nothing for fear of having her deal with the repercussions of calling the boys out?

It saddens me, deeply, to know that these things happen in places where we, as parents, are trusting other adults to keep our children safe. But it doesn't shock me.  I remember the bus when I was in school. I remember how unruly it could get, how one driver who has to focus on the road would never have been able to control the amount of kids he or she was supposed to be in charge of. 

But sexual harassment was, thankfully, not something I had to deal with on the bus.  And it scares me to know that I might have to have my kids ride those buses when they are older. Right now they ride buses with kids ranging in age from 5 to 11 and these kinds of concerns haven't come up.  But next year Bug goes to middle school, where things get more complicated and meaner. 

I'm just horrified.

Some people pay a lot more to feel better about themselves...

As an eBay seller, I don't get the same type of social camaraderie that most people get at their 9 to 5 job where other employees gather around a water cooler or whatever and chat.

So I get my chat on with other eBay sellers on an assortment of forums and facebook groups.  And those groups are awesome.  I honestly would not be the seller I am today if it weren't for the wealth of knowledge that these ladies share. Mostly ladies... there are some men, too.

Anyhow, so I frequent a forum specifically for clothing sellers on eBay and, just like any gathering of strong women with varied opinions, things can get a little heated sometimes.

I guess around Christmastime, one of the members posted that she was going through a rough time.  She was having a hard time paying her bills, her eBay fees were due, and her ability to sell and make any money at all was going to be compromised.  Other members rallied around her and started sending her small PayPal payments to help out.  Five dollars, ten dollars, whatever they could safely give.

And this member who was going through this rough time was able to pay her fees or her Internet bill or whatever it was that she needed to pay and keep on selling.

Fast forward to the past week or so and this same member comes along and starts posting little conversational things about getting a new dog, replacing the furniture in her house, getting a new roof on her (4000 square foot) house and all kinds of stuff.

And feathers start to get ruffled.  People felt like they were scammed.  How, in less than 6 months, did this member get back on her feet to the point where she can afford to buy furniture and replace a roof?

People started questioning her, asking her if she planned to pay back the people who had helped her in the past, basically accusing her of taking advantage of the generosity of the board.

And maybe I shouldn't even have an opinion about it. I don't remember the original post and I didn't donate any money to her cause, but I'm like all those women with strong opinions so I'm going to talk about it, anyway.

I question the generosity of the people who are upset.  It seems to me that if I give someone a few bucks to get back on their feet, that's exactly what I want them to do.  I hope that the money I give to them will help them over whatever rough patch they are going through and be able to live their life in a normal fashion.  I'm not going to begrudge them comfort once they do get back on their feet. 

Upon reading further into the situation, I noticed that this seller commented on her "new" furniture and how she was shopping for it at a thrift store.  She talked about replacing her roof and having it financed because the old one had been leaking.  And I know that a lot of these other women, the ones who are all up in arms and questioning whether their little loans are going to be repayed, have read these same things.

Unless I specifically state that this money is a loan, I don't expect it back.  I don't expect that once this person gets back on their feet they're going to send my ten dollars back. And I certainly don't question someone buying a couch at the Goodwill and replacing an old, leaky roof.

When you give someone a gift, you give it to them without strings.  You don't remind them constantly that you helped them, you don't give them fifteen dollars and a side of guilt, you just give.

But it seems like there are so many people who have some sort of checklist going on in their heads.  They're tallying up everything they've ever done for anyone else and then using those "brownie points" as leverage at a later date. As far as I know, this woman never asked for help.  She never begged for money.  People gave it to her out of their own free will.  And they wouldn't have done it if it didn't do something for them, too. 

Once I was having a conversation with Jenny about panhandlers.  In South Florida we have panhandlers all over the place.  Jenny has an interesting view on them.  She looks at them as if they are providing a "feel good" service.  Say that today I'm not feeling so good about myself.  I can give a couple bucks to a panhandler and poof! I've done a good deed and can now feel better about myself. 

Most days I don't need that service, but isn't it nice that it's there just in case I'm really feeling like I'm a crappy person one day?

So when those members started sending their friend little payments to help her out, they got to experience that "feel good" service.  Bought and paid for.  No refunds.

Where @bethenny and @domesticspaz are BFFs and delusion plays no part in it...

I'm watching Bethenny Ever After, the most recent episode where she has her birthday meltdown.  And by the way, I love Bethenny... in my delusional happy land we are best friends and meet for light lunches and Skinny Girl Margaritas every Monday afternoon.  I'm not completely off base, either. We've talked before. I have proof.

See? A budding relationship.

But I digress. Anyhow, so I'm watching this episode and the part where Jason (her husband, don't you know these things?) brings out the birthday surprise in front of everyone at her party almost made me cry.  She so clearly does not know how to handle that kind of attention, and I get it 100%.

And you might say "C'mon, this is Bethenny Frankel. She has attention on her all the time. She loves that crap."

But no. For some weird reason, birthday attention is just different.  In the episode Bethenny has a conversation with her make-up artist that hits the nail on the head. I'm paraphrasing here, but the make-up artist says to her something like "you either get too much attention or not enough" and then "you don't want to get disappointed, so you don't prepare yourself, and then you're disappointed because you didn't prepare."

And it was like an a-ha moment for me.  Because that's exactly it. I think, for some reason, and I can only speak for myself, I've decided that I don't deserve that attention, so it's uncomfortable to receive it. For Bethenny, maybe it's because birthdays were probably a big disappointment for her based on her parents being suck ass, non-deserving of a kid, parents.  So preparing herself for a big happy birthday is like setting herself up for disappointment... but then getting it without being prepared for it is completely uncomfortable and scary.

My parents don't suck at all.  And my birthday was never forgotten (can you imagine how grown-up Samantha Baker might handle birthdays?) or understated when I was growing up. It wasn't like today's kids who get a themed party with friends invited every year, but my mom would make a spice cake and there would be presents and my grandmothers would send cards with money in them ($8 for my 8th birthday, $9 for my 9th, and so on) and I would get to pick what we had for dinner.  And that was good.  A couple of years I got to have a party and invite friends (my 7th and 16th) and on my 8th birthday my parents took my best friend and I to Disney World, which was awesome.

But I was never comfortable when all the attention was focused on me.  When I was really little I would cry when people sang "Happy Birthday" to me.  I remember the feeling, too.  This desperate feeling of all the eyes being on me, singing, staring, expecting something.  I hated it.

So I understood when Munchkin cried when she was younger, too.  I remember one year telling my family that we wouldn't sing to Munchkin. We were just going to have the cake and open presents - no singing.  They overruled me and sang anyhow (you have to sing, it's her birthday!) and she cried and I felt her pain.

Because there's just something about that birthday attention. There has to be some, but too much is a problem.  A big 40th birthday celebration, complete with violinists using hot pink violins (what the hell was that?) and a Bravo TV crew, might be just a little too much for even the most seasoned celebrity.

And Jason being all "It hurt me so much that she wasn't excited. She should have fun because we put so much effort into it" made me want to smack him.  He appears to be a great guy, truly... but projecting his own love of birthdays onto her and then expecting her to react the way he wants her to react is not supportive.  "I wanted to tell her to suck it up. Sometimes you just have to put a happy face on."

It's her party, Mister Perfect Family, and she can cry if she wants to.

The Spaz kicks this meme in the teeth and steals it's lunch money

So I'm just going to knock out the rest of this meme right here today. I'm not overly thrilled with the remaining topics on it, so I figure I'll just give you all another bulk post. Today it's a TENfer.

Day 21 - (scenario) Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?

I go to her. She's my best friend. No argument we could have ever had would keep me from her side if she was injured. This question gets a resounding "duh" from me and makes me think this meme was written by a 12 year old.

Day 22 - Something you wish you hadn't done in your life.

Started this meme?

Day 23 - Something you wish you had done in your life.

When I was a senior in high school I applied to a bunch of colleges. One of them was Loyola in New Orleans. Sometimes I think that if I had gone there instead of to UF I may have been more successful. But I was scared to go so far from home and I was in love and wanted to be close to my boyfriend at the time and all my friends were going to UF so I declined the invitation to go there.

But if I had, my life would probably be a lot different and I probably wouldn't have The Man and the goblins... so I can't say a different choice would have been better.

Day 24 - Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs.

No.

Day 25 - The reason you believe you're still alive today.

What kind of a question is this? I'm alive because I haven't died yet. And that's a good thing.

Day 26 - Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why?

I think most people, at one dark time or another, have thought that life might not be worth living. I've never really let that thought linger in my mind for an extended period of time, though. I know that life has its ups and downs and I've always been hopeful for the future. So even when things are really hard, I know that whatever phase I am in will pass.

Day 27 - What's the best thing going on for you now?

It's The Man. I know that sounds all hokey and sugary sweet, but it's the truth. He's my happy place when things are tough. Most relationships suffer when times are stressful, but it's the opposite in our relationship. When I feel like the roof is about to cave in, The Man is the one that shows me everything is going to be alright. The tough times are what have made our relationship as solid as it is. That's how I know he's a keeper.

Day 28 - What if you were pregnant or got someone pregnant, what would you do?

If I got someone pregnant I'd call a doctor... and then Guinness... and then the National Enquirer. If I got pregnant (again), I'd be shocked. And considering that I've had a tubal ligation, I'd be petrified I had some sort of ectopic pregnancy thing going on. So I guess I'd call a doctor for that, too.

But I guess the question is truly more about what would I do if I found myself to be pregnant and everything was normal about the pregnancy... and in that case, I'm sure The Man and I would persevere. At this stage in our lives, it would not be a welcome thing at first. There would be shock, tears, a mourning of the loss of our late forties and beyond (because we're counting down, y'all), The Man would lament the imminent thinning of his wallet and hair, and I would lament the loss of sleep and sanity.

And that would go on for a while, and then I'm sure we'd become accustomed to the idea, as people tend to do, and we'd get excited and plan and all that junk. And then we'd fall in love with our fourth goblin. But let's hope that doesn't happen, kay?

Day 29 - Something you hope to change about yourself. And why.

I feel like I already answered this question somewhere in the days before. I'd like to become more organized. I did already answer this, I know it.

Day 30 - A letter to yourself, tell yourself EVERYTHING you love about yourself.

Dear Beth,

You make me laugh. Considering I am you, that's probably more of a bad thing than a good thing, but I don't care. Laughing is good and I'm glad you make me laugh.

You have really nice hair. Especially now that you've found the correct products to use in it. It would be nicer if your hair didn't insist on turning gray before you'd ever reached 30, but thanks to the advent of at home hair color, it's really not that big of a deal.

That's enough for now. I wouldn't want you to get a big ego.

Love,
Beth

So that's that. We'll resume our regularly scheduled blog posts tomorrow later today.

The Spaz & The Man go on a date

The Man and I had a date the other night. Like, for REAL a date. We had no kids with us and we went to a restaurant that did not have a kids menu and I ordered a $12 glass of wine. Heck, I ordered two of them. I could have almost had two boxes of wine for that, but ambiance, people... ambiance.

The restaurant was French and located next to the water and we sat outside and enjoyed a gorgeous South Florida night and I felt fancy.

French restaurants are always fun because I get to base what I'm going to order on what I can actually pronounce so that I don't look like a fool to the server. It was all for naught, though, because for an appetizer we ordered this Bistro plate where you pick two cheeses and one meat and they put it all together with some other delicious munchies and I couldn't pronounce any of that stuff, except for Gruyere. So we asked the server for recommendations. And it was good. French cheese is super fantastic.

After our delicious meal, we decided to walk by the water for a while and talk. It was heavenly to be out and wearing make-up and perfume and nail polish on my toes and to be carrying a purse that barely fit my wallet and lip gloss.

We held hands, we talked, we looked at the lights on the water, it was peaceful and romantic and really a perfect date.

And then we went to Walmart.

Yeah... sort of a culture shock. I would have preferred a more upscale grocery store, but at 1 AM you take what you can get. And the cat probably would have smothered us in our sleep if we didn't bring cat food home.

We were the fanciest people at Walmart, though. I'm sure of that.

Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds, Purple Haze, and Mr. Brownstone

I've had my experiences with drugs. I won't pretend I haven't. When I was a kid, my dad lectured me regularly on the dangers of drugs. He'd tell me stories of people he knew who found themselves held by the powers of cocaine and heroin and how it ruined their lives. And for most of my teenage years those stories kept me from experimentation.

When I got a little older I dipped my toes into the waters of drug use with a little pot and some LSD, but for the most part I stayed away from drugs. I like to be in my right mind, I guess, and anything that alters my reality is a little uncomfortable. So drugs never really captured me.

It's my opinion that marijuana should be legalized. Or at the very least, decriminalized. I see no reason to imprison people who like to giggle and eat Doritos and I see far more damage done by alcohol than pot.

I guess I have a pretty moderate attitude toward mind altering chemicals. It's not really any of my business whether another person decides to spend their life in a drug induced haze or mania. As long as that person isn't coming into my home and robbing me or holding me at gunpoint, I don't concern myself with their decision to throw their life away. Unfortunately, those drugs often push a person to endanger other people and that's when I think laws need to protect the innocent.

When it comes to my own children, I give them the same lectures that my dad gave me. Those talks kept my sisters and I on a pretty straight path, at least until we were old enough to make more educated decisions. If I find out that one of my children, in their adulthood, decides to experiment with drugs I will continue to give them those lectures. I will continue to talk to them about the dangers and the risks and I will pray they know their limits and know when to say no thanks.

The Teenager and I have talked about drugs and so far it seems she's not that interested. At 17, I'm sure that she's encountered a reasonable amount of peer pressure to try things and I know what it feels like to want to be accepted by even the most surly of friends.

My advice was to tell her friends how badass she used to be and how she can't smoke that stuff anymore because her parents are drug testing her on a regular basis. Or how she's on probation with the law and has to come up with a clean urine sample.

Or she can just tell them she doesn't feel like it. Whatever works in that situation. In my experience, kids don't push as hard as people think they might. A simple "no thanks" works pretty well and doesn't raise many eyebrows.

This post was Day 20 on the 30 day meme, Your views on drugs & alcohol.

These subjects shouldn't be discussed at garden parties or other social events in polite society... good thing I don't go to garden parties...

Today is Day 19 on the 30 day meme and it's a doozy. Today I'm supposed to talk about politics and/or religion. Two subjects I've been told never to talk about.

And that's good advice, really, because these conversations never really lead anywhere good. Unless you're with like minded people, in which case what's the point?

But for the sake of not being a quitter, I'm in!

As for politics, I tend to lean libertarian. I hesitate to lock myself in there, but I definitely lean there. I believe in free enterprise and small government. I think people should be free to make their own decisions as long as those decisions don't harm others or prevent others from making their own decisions. I worry about anyone leaning too far to the left or too far to the right. Bumper stickers stating political opinions irritate me. Sometimes they even ignite a private little rage within me.

Today I saw one that said "Remember 9-11-01. Because the Democrats have already forgotten." On the same car was another sticker that said "Does my American flag offend you? Call 1-800-LEAVE-THE-USA" And it sort of made me want to smash in their windows. Not that the idea behind either of those stickers was so offensive... but the manner in which the message is delivered is. It was parked in a handicapped spot. I was tempted to wait and see if the driver came out and was actually handicapped. Then I realized I would have been disappointed if they were handicapped, so I went on with my life.

As for religion, I've cause many a loved one much agony over this. I was raised in a non-practicing Catholic household and religion was never forced down my throat. The story of Jesus and the Virgin Mary is beautiful and the promises Christianity make are truly amazing.

But I will never be a Christian.

Do I believe in God? I haven't decided.

I study Buddhism and I try to follow the teachings of Siddhartha Gautama. It's a path that I will continue to walk for the rest of my life. And whether I am reborn into a new life when this one is over and get to go further in my quest for enlightenment is not something I dwell on. Maybe that's what happens and maybe we are all reunited with our loved ones in heaven. It's not for me to know or pretend to know.

What I do know is that I can continue to live my life as close to the Eightfold Path and the Middle Way as I possibly can. I can bring myself back to center when I stray, and I can truly live the most honest and noble life I am capable of.

And if that lands me reborn or in heaven or just recycled into the earth to feed plants and worms, that's just fine with me.

First comes love, then comes a legal civil union, then comes an adopted baby from Vietnam in the baby carriage

Finally this meme got a little interesting! For Day 18 I'm assigned to write about my views on gay marriage.

My opinion on this subject is a resounding "Of COURSE!" And I can't even wrap my head around any other option. Why wouldn't two people who love each other be allowed to marry each other? And don't come back with some stupid ass argument like "What's next? Should we let people marry their dog?"

Dogs aren't people, y'all. You show me a dog that can sign a marriage certificate and say vows and I'll give this dumbass argument some thought.

It surprises me that this is such an issue with people. In my opinion, there's no argument to be had. Don't bring your religion into it, because then you're just persecuting someone based on their different religious beliefs and you may as well be driving them out of England in the 16th century. Don't tell me that marriage is a commitment before God and God thinks homosexuality is an abomination. That's what your marriage may be to you, but that's not what a ton of other marriages are about and you didn't stand up at their wedding and tell them they couldn't get married. Today, marriage is a legal agreement.

Maybe we should just abolish everyone else's marriage and make them all legally go get "domestic partnerships" and marriage could be saved for something that has nothing to do with legality and only to do with religion. Then it wouldn't be your business or my business whether Bob and Bill or Jennifer and Jessica were married because they did it in their own church under their own religious guidelines. And legally, we'd all have the same equality that we should have.

That all being said, marriage is not important to me. I have been married before and that didn't work out. The Man and I decided not to legally marry, but we are more committed to each other than my husband and I ever were. Maybe when everyone else who loves each other can legally marry, we'll get married, too.

In Vegas, by an Elvis impersonator or maybe a fabulous drag queen. Definitely the drag queen.

Bring me a TAB and a chocolate doughnut, please. Hold the strawberry ice cream.

Ah, we've arrived at Day 15 of our meme. Something or someone you couldn't live without, because you've tried living without it.

This one's easy.

It's diet soda. Dammit, I love diet soda. There's nothing better than opening the fridge first thing in the morning and cracking open a cold can of diet soda. I'm not horribly particular on the type of diet soda, either. Some people are all about Coke and others Pepsi, some people love a Dr Pepper or a 7-up. I'll take them all. Give me aspartame and fizzies and I'm happy. Add cherry flavoring and I'll be your new best friend.

I have tried to break the habit. I've read stuff that made me think the aspartame was going to cause me to grow a third eye or start barking at random intervals. And I'm cool with the Splenda versions of diet soda, too. In fact, TAB, made with saccharin, is probably my favorite of all. I think my mother put it in my baby bottles.

When I was growing up, we probably went through 10 2 liter bottles of TAB and then later Diet Coke in my house a week. That might even be a low estimate. My dad never touched the stuff, choosing to drink mostly water and occasionally an iced tea with no sweetener. He's always been the healthiest out of all of us. We didn't even typically use glasses. We'd just take a "chug" from the bottle straight out of the fridge. We were so classy.

There was always a 2 liter in the door of our fridge and whoever drank the last "chug" had to replace it with a 2 liter that would be found in the fridge located in the garage. My mom called it the "back porch fridge" because evidently in the years before I was born they had a refrigerator located on the back porch and she never could stop calling the 2nd fridge that. I think she might still call her garage refrigerator that.

I've heard warnings that if you drink straight out of a 2 liter bottle it will go flat faster. We never had one in our fridge long enough to know if that is true or not.

I don't buy myself diet soda on a regular basis. Though, the last time I went to Publix they had these two new flavors of Diet Mountain Dew (Supernova and Voltage) and I did grab a 12 pack of both of them. Delicious, by the way, and with lots of caffeine. Huzzah!

So I don't always have it in the house. It's the only way I can regulate myself. I grab one every time I visit my parents, who keep a stocked assortment of sodas in the "back porch" fridge, and it's fabulous.

The best, is really a fountain soda, though. And please don't tell me how disgusting fountain sodas are and the lines don't get cleaned and all of it. I know. I've heard it all. But there's just nothing like a big ginormous* cup of crushed ice and a cold diet soda with a straw. The deliciousness.

At one point I tried to switch to regular soda because I thought the artificial sweeteners were surely going to send me to an early grave. But I was panicked about the calories and I couldn't really enjoy it. Hand over the box of doughnuts, but don't you dare put a real Coke in front of me.

Why can't they come up with calorie free doughnuts that taste that good?

And on a similar note, I'm going to go ahead and knock out Day 16 of the meme, too. Someone or something you definitely could live without.

This one is strawberry ice cream. I never could stomach it. Strawberry ice cream, strawberry milkshakes, all of it. Blech. And what the hell is up with Neopolitan? Why would someone ruin that delicious chocolate and vanilla with that horrendous pink stripe? When I was a kid my dad would buy Neopolitan ice cream and my sisters and I would attack the chocolate and vanilla leaving only this perfectly formed island of strawberry in the middle of the carton. Like a pink land bridge across the carton with remnants of chocolate and vanilla on either side. Come to think of it, that strawberry ice cream was nothing but an unwelcome implementation of segregation.