The Spaz on Faith

You hear it all the time from religious organizations mostly - "You have to have faith."

I've got a problem with faith. Faith is defined as complete confidence or trust in someone or something.

There are things I have faith in. I have faith that my alarm clock will wake me up in the morning. I have faith that the brakes will work in my minivan when I drive my kids to scouts. I have faith that The Man will come home to me every day and I have faith that it will rain almost every afternoon in the summer in South Florida.

These are things that have proven themselves to me over and over again and therefore I have grown to have faith in them.

But that's not the kind of faith that most religions are talking about. They're talking about blind faith. Faith that there is a being somewhere, somehow, that has a plan for your life and knows what you're thinking and is looking out for your best interests.

I'm not the oldest and wisest person around, but in my 38 years I've learned that if anyone's going to have a plan for my life or look out for my best interests, it's got to be me. Not God, not my parents, not The Man. I'm the only one who can do it for myself.

So no, I don't believe there is a spiritual higher power that gives even the tiniest care whether I win the lottery or get hit by a bus tomorrow. I don't think anyone is keeping score as to whether I've been a good person or a bad person or made the right decisions in my life and I certainly don't think there's a magical mansion in the sky waiting for me when I die if I choose to believe that line of bull.

It's up to me and only me to do the right thing and make the best decisions for myself. My reward for that is to end up in the places I want to end up and to become the person I am happiest being. What happens when this life is all over is an unknown that no one's ever going to know. It's not important.

The only thing that matters is making the right choices now.

Cha cha cha changes

Hey y'all. It's been a while but I'm still kicking. 

Yesterday was the first day of school around these parts and we've had a busy summer leading up to it. Or not so busy.... we actually didn't really do anything out of the ordinary this summer. We had some obligatory beach trips and some trips to the museum and the aquarium and the zoo. All the standard summer stuff. 

But yesterday was an adventure. 

Goober started middle school yesterday. He was a little nervous to go, but wasn't really letting on. We went to his orientation last Friday which really wasn't much of an orientation. It was more of a chance to get his student ID, learn how to open his locker, and give the school money. So the unknown of what his schedule would be and where all his classes would be was still in his head yesterday morning when he went to meet the bus for school.

Unfortunately, the bus didn't show up. Goober came back home with the hint of tears in his eyes that the bus hadn't shown up to his stop. The Man started to tell him to just go back to the stop and wait because they were probably just running late as it was the first day. But one look at his face and I said "No, I'll drive you." Poor kid was under enough stress without having to worry about the damn bus. 

Let me just tell you that watching my baby walk into that middle school was no easy feat. Eighth graders look really big next to my Goober.  

It all must have gone okay though because he came home smiling and all seemed well. 

In other exciting firsts, Munchkin started high school. We live super close to the high school so Bug and Munchkin ride their bikes to school. We got Munchkin a fancy bike with a thing on the back she can strap her saxophone to and a cute basket in front. It is super stylish and she rocks it.  As is her way, she breezed through her first day and came home all smiles.

Bug started his sophomore year of high school and we're hoping this year is a big change for him. Last year Bug didn't really apply himself to school and it caused some major issues. This year we've made some changes at home that I really think are going to help Bug stay on track. Namely the fact that The Man has been working from home and will be here most days when the kids get home from school. And also that Bug is sharing two classes with Munchkin (same teacher, same period) and will have to be accountable for those classes or Munchkin will rat him out faster than you can say "sibling rivalry."

In other exciting news, I started my Senior year of college yesterday.

That's right. I'm a college student now. 

It's been a while since I've been to school. Just over ten years, in fact. When I started discussing it with my dad back in May, it really kind of seemed like this unattainable thing. I had left that idea of a Bachelor's Degree in the dirt when my babies were small and really hadn't looked back. But now that my babies aren't really babies anymore, it seemed like it might be a good time to take that plunge and see how much I needed to do to finish up. 

After weeks of contacting different schools and figuring out what I would need to do, I realized I could have my Bachelor's in less than a year if I went back full time. So that's exactly what I'm doing. 

Thank goodness for the advancements in technology because I can finish the degree I started over a decade ago without having to step foot in a classroom. Everything is online and yesterday I listened to my first college lecture in forever while siting at my desk at home, eating soup, and wearing my pajamas. Fantastic. 

So there's big changes going on here in Spazland and I think they're all for the best. I might update more frequently or you might not hear from me again until I'm a graduate. I'm just flying by the seat of my pants over here.